Welcome back to another episode of Party Talk, it is Red Ribbon Week. This is the Superbowl of drug prevention. And if you’re like me, it is time to get busy. Now, when I recorded this, you can see if you’re watching on YouTube, I am enjoying some time at home relaxing before the week of insanity, like that is the only way to put it flying from state to state, doing assemblies a bunch of fun, but a bunch of education and impact for young people. So I hope that this week, you see a ton of success, a ton of involvement with the students, and more importantly, a ton of engagement and education so that they actually know what Red Ribbon Week is all about what it means for them and their health and their future. And that you get to do what this press or this podcast is all about. Maybe even launching or growing your youth prevention club, whether that’s a youth Coalition, a youth group, any sort of, of group that your students have created to be a positive impact on their student body for advocacy, mental health, drug prevention, all that kind of stuff. So with all that said, let’s jump in today I want to talk about how to launch and grow and even retain students in your youth drug prevention club. This can be based out of the school, out of an after school program, or maybe just something within your community. But I want to identify five mistakes that I see people in our field making all the time. And then give you five tips to overcome and not fall victim to these things because they’re actually really easy mistakes to make. You know, we should just call this out to sabotage your Youth Prevention Club.

5 Mistakes that People Make in Drug Prevention

Here we go. The first way to sabotage it is by targeting everyone. Do not have a target audience instead, invite everyone and hope that everyone shows up. Because, hey, everyone should be gung ho about this topic. I’m not going to argue with the thought behind that. Because that’s a great thought everyone should be about saving lives and making great decisions. I would really argue that when you go and target everyone, for whatever group you’re building, you reach no one. It’s kinda like saying, hey, we want all of you. It’s that friend who says, Oh, I hate soccer. And then somebody else is like, Oh, I love soccer. They’re like, Yeah, me too. I love soccer. It’s fake. It’s not genuine, it seems manipulative. And people don’t trust you. Instead, you need a stance, something you believe in, and then you will attract the right people. I love sharing the story of how I started throwing these giant house parties on my campus without any drugs or alcohol. Because before I started doing that, I thought there was no unlikely, right, I’m alone on this campus full of 9000 people. But as soon as you stand out and show what you believe in, what will happen is people start following you. So as soon as I started to throw these, quote, “Sober house parties”, I was a magnet to people, the right kind of people started coming to me, I didn’t have to look for friends anymore. They looked for me. And that is what happens when you show what you’re about. And your mission is you don’t have to reach everyone anymore. The right people will find you so you need a target. The second mistake that people make is they try to go way too fast. Students join their club and in the first meeting, they start talking about plans about how they’re going to do advocacy, how they’re going to throw these giant events, how they’re going to save countless lives. And they paint this picture this mountain of saying, “Hey, we’re going to climb Mount Everest and realize that the students are just there, probably because they wanted pizza.” Maybe they want some candy at that fair, and you invited. They didn’t come there to change the world yet. See, you if you look at even just the last episode, some of our Vive 18 Ambassadors shared why they joined a club. And oftentimes it was for a small reason, or just something to check out. Meet them where they’re at. If they came to get a t-shirt, awesome, you’re gonna give them a t-shirt, you’re gonna have a little fun and make them feel known. And then you’re going to share your mission and what you’re all about. You’re going to take it slow, and we’ll talk about how to ease them into the mission so that they become real advocates, and you can start running. But when you start, you’re gonna start crawling, then you’ll walk, then you’ll run. And I kind of think of it like, like when you make eggs, the way my wife likes eggs is that when you put it on the pan, you let it sit for a little bit, and then you poke the yolk that makes it firm. So that when you flip it over, the yolk doesn’t run everywhere. And we don’t want our students running out of our meetings for the hills, like, we want them thinking like, “this is fun, I can do this, I can ease into this, and it’s manageable.” And you also know that they have a lot of other things going on. So if you scare them with this giant mission, they’re going to think, “well, I don’t have time for this, or this is too much for me, or I can’t even do this.” So hesitate, go slow, instead of going too fast. Number three. Here’s how you can sabotage your youth club. Try to be like your kids. wear the same shoes as them, dress like them, talk like them. Basically try too hard. I see this mistake made all the time. You know, I knew, I see it in ministry actually, too. I was a youth pastor for a couple years. And what I saw is the truth. Kids can smell your how do I say this politely? like you’re trying too hard, you’re inauthentic. You’re trying to fool them or you know, you’re 30 or 40 years old, and you’re trying to be 15. That’s not an attractive look, you don’t have to go out and buy the latest Nike shoes that they’re wearing. Just be confident in the shoes that you’re wearing. Sure, if that’s something they’re into, ask them about their shoes, that’s great. Meet them where they are and ask about their interests. But you don’t have to go and be like them. Instead, you should assume that they’re, you’re a good role model. And they can be tried to be like you, you can influence them, but don’t let them influence you. That is the posture that we should have as leaders. You’ve probably seen this too, I mean, just in like, in life and in dating, it feels desperate. When you try too hard to attract someone, it’s, it’s not attractive at all, it feels desperate. So you can be confident in who you are. And we’ll talk about that, in the solution section of this, how you can get over that fear of it to be like them, I need to attract them and be cool. Because the reality is you do not need to be cool, don’t start buying new clothes, buy new shoes, or starting to play fortnight unless you really, really want to, okay? “Do you, be yourself and they will like that.” Number four, stop cutting them off and taking over their meetings or events. And listen, I know it’s frustrating, when it’s not going as fast as you want it to or it’s frustrating that they get they keep getting off track. And they keep going on tangents. Your job is is not to take over the meeting and to make it go right. Your job is to guide them and mentor them so that they can run a meeting correctly or an event correctly. Because if you do it, it’s not going to be sustainable, you’ll always be there to do it for them. And as soon as you’re gone, the club is going to falter and fail. Your job is to make sure that they can do it successfully. And that means you’re training them. That’s a hard job. You are teaching a teenager and mentoring and coaching a teenager to do great work. Who said this was going to be easy. I don’t want to make that impression. I will say it is simple, but it is not easy. And we’ll talk about some steps on how to make this simple. If you struggle with that one, just remember the second one to like, “Hey, this is slow work. You know, we’re poke a yoke, we’re putting the fire down on a low level. And we’re letting this you know this workout itself.” We’re not pressing the pedal to the metal to say we got to change the world right now. This is long,, slow work. And it’s a marathon not a sprint. The five thing, the fifth thing that you can do to sabotage your prevention club is to take credit for everything.

Ah, some of you have probably have bosses that take all the credit and they’re rock stars. Sometimes I I mean I love praise so I love it when people tell me I do a good job. And I this is a good thing for me to remember. It’s about congratulating the people who are working with you, anytime somebody gives me credit, like “I need to be better about passing that on to someone else.“ Because without the students in this work, we are very, very limited. And so when we can highlight them, congratulate them, that helps them feel appreciated. And what’s really, really crazy if you study employment or management, you know that people leave their jobs when they feel unappreciated. And students are no different. If they’re doing hard work, and they feel unappreciated, they’re more likely to leave this club because they don’t have to be there. This is a choice. And we should make it a good experience. So just like in prevention, when we don’t just talk about what not to do, this isn’t a, “Hey, don’t do drugs, or say no to drugs.” That’s not helpful. We have to give them tools and things to do. Let’s do the same right here. So we’re done with the five mistakes, what things to avoid, let’s talk about how to do this correctly.

5 Tips to Build a Successful Club

The first thing, so instead of targeting everyone reaching no one, we’re going to use a strategic invitation. That means that your invitation is going to be purposeful, and it’s going to be targeted. Here’s how I love to train people on this is we’re going to use a three pronged invitation strategy. The first part is going to be the most targeted, you’re going to work with your school counselor or school principal, somebody a volunteer or in the community who can help identify students that are already leaders. And then those that have leadership potential. These are the ones they might have drug use around them in the hall, maybe they’re what someone called at risk for using, and you want to pull them in and be a great influence on them. And then you’re also getting the students who might be involved in another club, they have some leadership experience already, that they might be a good fit as well, and they’re looking to grow their resume. So you’re going to target them with a written letter that makes them feel so special, that they were identified as a potential leader to make a difference in their community, and they’re invited to join this group, that’s going to be really, really powerful. That’s your targeted approach, you’re going to couple that with a general invitation. That is a big fun event. This could be something like I mean, shameless plug, bringing in a Vive 18 drug prevention and educator and speaker, somebody to have an awesome experience school assembly, they get an education, but they also get invited to join the movement and make an impact in their community. So it’s not a one and done. It’s, you know, something that passes through, it’s an experience that they have fun with. And then they get to be involved with further as you continue the work. That is the second part of it. But again, it has to be fun. It doesn’t have to be a Vive 18 Speaker could be, but it could be an event that you host on school grounds or after school, something special that shows this work is not scary. We’re not asking you to do something scary, but we’re asking you to do something fun. And so that first impression with the general student body is really, really important. If you have a scary event, and then invite them to be a part of that. They’re going to think that the rest of your stuff is scary or boring, or lecture, whatever that might be. And then the third part of it is to have this exclusive event that is only for the people who say yes. So maybe it’s your first like meeting or a special event that if they opt in, yes, I want to be a part of this, they get to go to it. So those are those three steps, you have the targeted letter, you’ve got the big fun event. And then you’ve got the exclusive event. The second thing you can do, and this is to avoid going too fast, and jumping right into it so that they get scared, is you want to give them a quick win. And this is a small project. Maybe it’s an event, maybe it’s something they’re going to create at your next meeting. And they can put together like all within that hour or that half hour. Some schools that we just worked with, they put together kind of like these bottles, and they had paint and sand and stuff in it. And it was kind of like a fidget toy. But they put in a word of encouragement on there. And something like some mental health education, and then they pass them out during the lunch period or their club fair. And, you know, they went like hotcakes. It was awesome. Right? students loved it. They’re like “Do you have any more like no, we ran out but if you join our club, we can make some more or it can be a small project like that.” But something that builds their confidence, I would challenge you to do something that they can put together within a month, so that you build momentum in your club, give them a quick win. And what it’s going to do is it’s going to build their investment, they’re going to feel ownership over your club and feel like they can do this. Tip number three, is to be yourself. I know that sounds so easy. It’s not easy, it’s simple, but it’s not easy. Instead of trying to be like them, I want you to think of your,  your role as a bowling alley. As stick with me for a year. So you’re a bowling alley, you are a fun, safe place for students who go. And when they’re veering off course you put up your bumpers, you know, you keep them in line and what the mission is, what their project is, whatever it is. And then just like the screen, you know, lights up with a turkey, when they hit a strike three times, or whatever it is, you get to celebrate them. That is your job. Your job is not to be cool. It’s not to be the most likable person in the club, it’s not to recruit, that’s their job. Your only job is to be that safe place, the person that they can look up to who’s confident who they are, who provides a good example of what an adult looks like and can look like what their future could be. And that, my friends, that is your role. And I’ll admit, I struggle with this sometimes. If you’ve seen my presentation, you know that I admit that I get nervous. Before every presentation, I use that as an illustration, to demonstrate coping skills. But I admit that I get nervous, like, “what if they don’t like me? What did they think I’m too nerdy.” And so being vulnerable is part of it. But I learned this, this, you can call it a trick. But I’ll just call it a reminder is that before I go on stage or before I interact with young people, I even have to remind myself every time “I’m not here for me, I’m not here to look cool. I’m here to give life saving and life changing information to them.” If they don’t like me, that’s okay. As long as I served them by giving them the information, everything else is up to them. So I can do everything in my power to just focus on what my role is that safe environment, that positive role model to keep them on track, the rest is up to them. And if you keep doing the right thing, I promise you will get the right result results. You can’t fake this, you can’t make it up or manufacture it. It’s just a matter of being confident that your role is not to be cool, not to be likable. But your role is to guide them, keep them on the mission, and to help facilitate a good time while you’re there. All right, the, the next one is about kind of a continuation of that one. So instead of taking over the meetings or taking over the events, if things are going either getting off track, or it’s going too slow. The number one tip I have is whenever you want to take over or say something or do something. Instead of giving your thoughts, your opinions, your directions, ask them a question. And your question could actually steer them into the thought that you wanted to share. But by asking it as a question, you keep them as the owners and leaders of the meeting or the event. For example, I was working with the university, they were throwing some drug free events. And I saw that they weren’t facilitating like an icebreaker activity or anything to get people talking. They were just assuming that the guests were going to do that themselves. And because they assumed that it wasn’t happening. So instead, I could go run in and do a game facilitate, you know, a competition or something. But instead, I  went and asked them. Hey, how do you think this is going right now? Well, I mean, nobody’s like doing anything or like getting involved in this stuff that we have set up.

Yeah, that’s, that’s a good point. How can we get them to do that? Or how can we show leadership and getting them to do those things? Say, “Well, I mean, we could start doing it. Or we could invite them to do that with us. Or we could start a bracket, like make it a competition great.” So they’re coming up with solutions. They’re getting the learning experience instead of instead of learning that, hey, when Jake’s here, he’s gonna save the day. They’re learning that they can come up with solutions and making you know, make the party better or, and they’re more likely to remember that next time it happens, because they feel the pride and ownership over that solution. And that moment. So think of every challenge in your club as a learning opportunity for your students. And if you ask them questions, it’s going to give them the confidence and the ability to overcome that the next time that challenge shows up. So again, you’re the guide, you’re the bumpers on the lane, you’re just keeping them on track. Best way to do that is by asking questions. And five, instead of taking credit, I like to do a couple things. Number one is anytime you get asked to do an interview, or maybe get featured on a podcast like this, right, if I asked you, hey, come after this open invitation, if you want to come talk about how awesome your youth coalition is, or youth prevention club is, I would love to have you on the show. And I would love it even more if you brought one of your students. So that’s the tip is bring one of your students along, if you get interviewed by the media, say “yes, that’s awesome. Let me bring a student with me.” So you both get quoted and they get to see themselves on screen or on page, whatever it is. The other one is to bring something small to your meetings, a little weird, like, item. And it could be something totally childish or weird, and they’ll love it, go to the dollar store and get a bunch of random stuff. Every time you show up to the meeting, have something to give away or a prize and identify someone for their great work. Or ask them to choose amongst their group, hey, what’s something you saw this week, that was awesome that you want to celebrate, and then lift that person up so that they get celebrated in front of everybody. This can be a really cool way to have a culture of acknowledgement and appreciation and a value instead of one that’s, you know, maybe we only, we only take notice of people’s stuff when they do stuff wrong. Or if it didn’t go right, that can be pretty toxic. So instead, we can have a culture of celebrating when things go right. And celebrating students for feeling good and doing the right thing. And isn’t that what prevention is all about as well. Like we’re all about celebrating good healthy decisions. Because if we can create a culture that has positive peer pressure, then we can bring more people into these healthy decisions and these healthy lifestyles. So I think that’s where the movement is. Alright, so there you have it, you have the five mistakes, you have five tips on how you can overcome those mistakes. And I want to take this time to share something big, that is going to be happening in February of 2024. So if you’ve been following Vive 18 Or me this year, you know that our movements are speaking program, you know, with the assemblies and studying youth, coalition’s and youth prevention clubs, has absolutely taken off. I have spent probably almost every week since mid summer, in two or three different states. And with all my travel this year, when I should have been watching Marvel movies on these planes, I have been working on a course for you. And so if you found value from anything on this short episode, you will probably find a lot of value in the course that I’m creating. So I’ve basically taken all the questions that we’ve been getting all the case studies that I’ve done on people starting clubs and failing or starting clubs and being successful, and highlighting, “what are the things that we can do to make sure that we give our youth the best opportunity to develop a strong group that not only grows, but sustains.” Now, I’m super excited about this, because I mean, not only is it going to have videos, templates, modules, frameworks, but it also is going to have examples of what people have done, the different events, different strategies and tactics to keep youth involved and make a thriving club. But also, I mean, we’re going to share the successes and the failures to like all of this stuff, to make sure that we’re learning from each other. And my favorite part, my favorite part is we’re going to build in a monthly session where you can come to this meeting, and it’s us youth leaders from across the nation, sharing our challenges, sharing our successes and ideas, brainstorming solutions together so that we are constantly growing and constantly having new opportunities to see what’s currently going on in our field and how we can stay ahead of the curve. Now my goal is to save you five to 10 hours per week with this course. I want it to be massive value and this course is doing incredible things not only for me personally, but also for my coalition because we’re getting more students involved. Because of that, we’ve got easier access to funding and opportunities and partners. And because of that our work is sustainable. And we’re making a change in our community. If you want, like early access and an invitation to this course, as we’re building it through February, I am happy to keep you in the loop and then to send you it as early as possible. If you want that just go to viveeighteen.com/intro. That’s v-i-v-e, or vive one eight.com/intro. And then in that short form, there’s something that’ll have a checkbox. Select that you’re interested in training, or conferences. And if you do that, you will be on my list to get this information as soon as soon as we have it available. So, again, that’s viveeighteen.com/intro, and select the training box as one of your interests, and then you’ll get that information. But with that said, I hope you found a ton of value from this episode of Party Talk where we empower leaders in youth drug prevention. If you’re listening to this on the Monday of Red Ribbon Week, I am praying that you impact a ton of students. You get them involved in your clubs and your sustainable work, and that students get educated with this life saving information. If you haven’t heard it recently, thank you so much for what you do. You’re incredible. Keep up the great work.